Gift Guide: What do get for your neighbor who always complains
We all have one. Mr. Dull Dawn and Mrs. Boring Bernice McBuzzkillington. Just as soon as your dinner party takes a raucous turn, or your impromptu dance floor starts to heat up, they are there asking you to quiet down. Reminding you of the time. Telling you things they have to do tomorrow. Well???? Get ahead of it this year. It’s emotional blackmail that we will employ. If you give them something nice they will be more reticent to complain. That’s not to say they won’t complain - but these gifts will buy you a few more decibels, a couple more hours, a few more attempts at remembering how to cartwheel, or - my go to - a few more stories of “walking down to the basement to grab something” behind the back of the sofa. At a minimum they will know you know what’s coming, and to be honest, you don’t care.
Let me paint you a picture starting at the top left. As always, Don and Bernice start the evening just like you: feeling festive with some light baking, sweet treats and atmospheric aperitifs BUT after about an hour of others having fun that they can faintly hear - they JUST CAN’T TAKE IT. Here is usually where you would get your complaint. Encourage them to re center and unwind with some noise cancelling or bedazzled headphones and other methods of relaxation. If that doesn’t work there are some natural remedies the whole family should try. Still not working? Invite them to do as you do - turn on their favorite tunes and dance in the kitchen with WAY more than one bottle of their favorite wine.
Cade’s Cakes “Cake Guts”
Christmas Baking Kit - a major bargain!
Rosemary Wreath - lovely to look at and an excellent back up when you realize you forgot your herbs at the grocery store
Sparkly festive martini earrings
Nutcracker decanter and matching shot glasses
Noise cancelling headphones
Bedazzled ear protection
Medication needlepoint pillows
Cozy throw blanket
Eye masks for the whole family
Calming essential oil drops for dogs
Moon Juice Adaptogen Sleep Aid
Low profile (but attractive!) record player and copies of your favorite vinyls (some of mine are Leon Bridges, the Beastie Boys, Maggie Rogers and Al Green
Multiple bottles of your favorite wine. Mine is (of course) Villa di Geggiano